Funny things you might hear if you are an unmarried boy attending your best friend’s wedding

Finally, the day has come. It’s your best friend’s wedding and you’re all set to rock the party. Not to mention the relief you feel when you look at your friend that you are still single and free. While you’re getting ready to wish your friend the very best for the matrimonial bliss that awaits him, you might be in for a few unwanted comments yourself. Being an eligible bachelor has its perks but it also attracts attention. It’s certainly up to you if you can take it sportingly but there may be times when it gets really insufferable. Here are a few one-liners that will make you duck for cover.


“Get ready, you are next”

Just when you were celebrating your freedom all over again, someone is bound to drop this bomb. Never take it lightly for whoever says it is most probably plotting to hook you up with someone. Just find yourself a quiet corner and get out of sight.

“How old are you, you’ve really grown up”

This is again a tricky one straight from the matchmaker. The rule is, just subtract five years from your age if you really have to answer this question. That way you’ll manage to keep the aunties away for another five years. Well, almost, if you manage to not attend a wedding for the next five years.

“When are you getting married, I know you have a secret girlfriend”

Really, are you serious? Where exactly did you spot me with my secret girlfriend? While you’re still figuring out who your mystery girlfriend is, someone has already introduced you to their niece or cousin or daughter. Make excuses and slip out while there’s still time or you’ll be left entertaining prospective girlfriends all evening.

“You should settle down”

This is as corny at it can get. While you’re busy downing a drink or two, dancing a few crazy steps or busy fighting off the bride’s friends, out of nowhere this one lands right in front of you. “It’s time you got more responsible, do you want me to look for a girl?” you’re about to thank them for their concern when you hear the warning bells ringing, just in time. Run for your life!

“How much do you earn”

Isn’t asking about anyone’s salary downright rude? Well, not at weddings and certainly not for matchmaking aunties. So don’t even think about reminding them of manners, instead make up a funny answer that will get you out of this awkward situation. The problem is, this kind of a question does not deserve a straight answer and you are probably not that well trained in dodging aunties. So muster all the wit and humor you possess and laugh it off. There is no other way out of this one.

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